August 2006, Weight Loss Journal
Updated November 24, 2007
7 August 2006
Weight: 178 (lost 22 lbs.)
BMI: 32.6
Arrrggghhh!!!!!
Gained another pound. PMS again. A week full of serious munchies cravings, water retention, and slacking because I felt blechk. I still haven't been doing my weight lifting either; although, after I got on the scale today I immediately picked up my dumbbells.
What is it about summer that makes me not want to exercise? What is it about summer that makes me feel so tired? Why is it that when I feel tired, I want to eat?
I tried to start doing my walk in the morning again, but it just isn't happening. It doesn't get dark until 10pm, so I don't fall asleep until midnight, so I don't wake up until close to 8am, and my husband is getting ready for work, which means that I don't have built-in babysitting. I'm having a hard time exercising in my living room in the morning because I keep thinking about all the things I want to get done before lunch while my kids watch their morning shows, eat breakfast, and play games.
I caught myself looking at the weight-loss pills section of the grocery store again. I reminded myself that a pill won't fix my problem and left without spending a dime on yet another weight-loss aid, but it was a wakeup call for me. It was a moment or realization that my motivation is waning. I haven't been excited to exercise lately. I haven't been proud to say that I'm a healthy eater when I'm faced with the temptations of junk food. I need to re-spark my motivation. I'm not quite sure how to do it. Rewards for reaching a goal are enticing enough for me right now. Affirmations are rather half-hearted these days. Ah-ha...
This week, I'm going to dedicate myself to re-motivating myself. I'm not going to focus so much on calories and exercises (I'm not going to stop thinking about them completely, but I'm not going to obsess over them either). Instead, I'm going to rediscover my motivation. Maybe then I won't struggle so much with the "I don't wanna" mood, and I'll be back on the weight loss track, watching the line on my weight loss graph go down.
28 August 2006
Weight: 177 (lost 23 lbs.)
BMI: 32.4
I took the last two weeks off from everything. I didn't exercise every day, but I did manage to get in a few workouts per week. I didn't pay attention to my food intake much and indulged quite a bit. I started to jump back up to 180, but the thought of being in the 180's again is just unacceptable, so I've managed to hold my weight steady.
I'm making a new goal to do weight lifting and/or yoga every morning while I watch television and do a 60-minute walk every evening (rather than the 30 to 45 minutes I had been doing).
Honestly, one of the reasons I've been inconsistent is because of showering. Showering seems like an odd excuse for not exercising, but it's true. I would shower in the morning and use that as an excuse to not walk in the evening, "I too tired to take another shower." I would shower in the evening and use that as an excuse to not exercise in the morning, "I don't have enough time to take another shower." Of course, it would be wise to do my weightlifting and walking together, but I don't have a huge block of time to do both. I'm deciding to shower in the evening after my walk, and in the morning, my weight lifting will not be intense enough to make me sweat, so I won't need another shower. If I do happen to need another shower, I'll jump in and out within 5 minutes and won't let it disrupt my day.
Another thing that has been an excuse for me lately is feeling that I just have to get one more thing done on my to-do list before I exercise. I just need to finish this project for work. I just need to do the dishes. I just need to play that game with my kids. I need to make exercise a priority again. I'm doing this for my health. Without good health, I can't play games with my kids. If I die early from obesity complications, I won't get to enjoy the fruits of my work. When I'm miserable because I'm ill, I won't care if the dishes are dirty.
I have to keep reminding myself, I deserve to be healthy. I deserve to have energy. I deserve to be able to run and play with my kids. I deserve to be strong enough to save my loved ones in an emergency. I deserve to look good.
